If Life Is A House

| by Graciela Roman |

if life is a house
and they say the eyes are the windows to the soul
then it could be said that she had the most beautiful blue shutters
that would shimmer green in just the right sunlight
she had spring time eyes
winter skin
autumn hair that would fall down her back
and a summer time smile that lasted year round
she was my mother
my 4 seasons on my life’s journey
my sanctuary no matter where i go
she’s my home away from home

they say that home is where you hang your hat
but for me it’s where they nailed up my heart
still beating
still bleeding
hung it up on her wall like an undried painting
just an unfinished piece of work
that vessel which once contained every color of the rainbow
is now splattered
dripping dusty earthy hazy shade of winter hues
colors that were once so unfamiliar to me

because i remember i used to say to her
mama i wish the whole world was pink
and she’d laugh and say
one day it will be
one day you’ll awake to a world of a rose colored hue
because someday somebody’s gonna love you

other times we wouldn’t speak at all
we’d sit out on the porch and just listen and smell the rain
it smelled of sweet dew drops
and hints of her perfume
and sometimes i swear
i can still smell her in the rain

just like i can hear her
her boisterous booming laugh crashing through the clouds
or in every raindrop
splashing on the ground
whistling on its way down
to harmonize so perfectly to the beat of her sweet wind-song melody

that’s when i can feel her
every prayerful raindrop
unique in its identity
just like the tips of her fingers coming together to teach me how to pray
or reaching down to rub my back and tell me everything will be okay

but one day i actually saw her
at the snap of a cataclysmic clap
it revealed to me a celestial tear
where i could see her stargaze as it shown down upon me
but she saw no colors there
so she reached above her to grab what would soon be
a post rainstorm rainbow
waiting there so patiently
she took it and spread it across her palette
reached from within to reveal that once so long forgotten piece of art
she took a brush and her new found colors
painted over that vessel
creating a kaleidoscope heart

and now i live in color again
i laugh in purple
and speak in oranges and in pinks
i dance to the beat of reds
but every night
just when i close my eyes
i’m able to see
a pair of the most beautiful blue shutters
that will always shimmer green
as they find themselves in the most perfect sunlight

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