| by MM |
I am alone in a world of my own making. I try to be kind to people, but my anger is always realized when I am by myself. I’m scared most of the time. I just quit my job. I suddenly realized I wasn’t wanted and unable to fit in. I did not realize the length of hatred toward me. This is not a new feeling. I accept responsibility for being disconnected and have a keen awareness that I am annoying. Just ask anyone who has heard me speak my story. I am not a hateful person but most definitely disconnected. I suspect that it is extremely difficult to understand, but it is based in fear. Fear of being blooming mad. Fear of hurting someone and fear of being hurt. I need professional help…. legal, mental and emotional. Who do you call for help when you trust no one. How does one free themselves when they are so afraid to turn in any direction? Is it possible to feel safe when one is on display for all to see? I don’t feel safe.