The Re-Writing of My Marriage

| by Monique Rust |

so, i wrote this song several years into my marriage.
i was thinking a lot at the time about the concept of monogamous foreverdom.
i mean, really? is this even natural?!?
i know that, for me, being forever “committed” sometimes resembled a sentence i might be serving in the loony bin…a kind-of treading-water purgatory for the truly sadomasochistic…THAT I HAD VOLUNTEERED TO BE A CARD-CARRYING MEMBER OF!

[thus, this facebook status of mine circa august, 2010:

“sometimes i feel like a part of the blessed institution that is marriage…and then other times i feel simply like marriage is ‘an institution’.”]

without going into the minutiae of the process, i ended up with a newfound respect for this union…an unchartered affinity for what i came to regard as

-this beautifully stifling coexistence
-a partnership unparalleled and certainly unrivaled by a life sublimely and mutually unraveled
-some final, ticking clock composed of equal parts love, duty, hate, virtue, sin, vice, and, ultimately, redemption.

for your consideration, here is “ball & chain”:

what’s it mean to be a man?
is it ‘catch-me, catch-me if you can’?
no, not you
not this time
you stayed right here, tucked in my side

so, i’mma be your bride
through supple and sinew
through struggle and health
we make each other better versions of ourself

there ain’t no me without you
don’t matter what you go and do
i’ll just be here,
singing where you left me,
some sad song in the minor key

cause i’mma be your man
through supple and sinew
through struggle and health
we make each other better versions of ourself

we’ll make each other better versions of ourself
let’s make each other better versions of ourself

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